Ich glaube an ein hat gearbeitet, wo wir unmenschlich sind.

nothing_eternal @ 2004-11-23T00:01:00

2004-11-23T05:02:28Z

Waking up I saw the world troubled and dying of choking, blood loss, and heatstroke The world had a chill and a bite to it I had never noticed before. When I went to the store I never saw a tree and I could barely breathe when I lifted my eyes not an eye met mine when I shouted in agony for this dying place there was no one to hear or reach to myy voice for so many years before but not so many I cant recall I remember when alarms were sounded and no one heard alarms of slight change and alarms of extinction not this clock radio shit you believe in and alarms rang temperatures rose guns aimed we stol the hearts of men and handed them to death we took them by their land and shook them upsid down we shook them all around and then we reached to the left and mostly to the right the dominant hand and squeezed the world until some of us sank and others ignored the information not provided by their newscasters not provided by their leaders passive to the point of immunity a reality show too real to watch inclined to instill prerecorded information to their children and cut back on the hugs and the kisses and the play more likely to press play on their TiVo than to pay attention to the desensitized masses we so proudly place upon the streets to nurture with toys and TV show and to cuddle with dancing Elmo’s and babysitters where were we for that the sun shone and killed and people still climbed into their boxes of pure sun to step into purer sun to turn themselves an even shade of brown to drape themselves inside and out with chemicals and food that remains mutated tainting the next generation with possibilities of death and disease pumping themselves so full of Rx and pharmaceuticals that tolerance became a death wish, pumping themselves so full of toxins that their tolerance killed them the world felt the need to educate less and make more to create a race of knowledge less people who watched too much and did so little

Waking up I realized it was today

hmmmm punctuation? i am getting nothing done this way.

nothing_eternal @ 2004-11-19T19:10:00

2004-11-20T00:14:14Z

nothing_eternal @ 2004-11-17T13:29:00

2004-11-17T18:29:31Z

Widerrufen die menschlichen Traditionen, die ich in zu einem faulen und rührenden Individuum nicht entwickeln werde....

sometimes its just better in german.

monday, XI 2004

2004-10-12T04:43:45Z

following momentary motionsickness the rest of the day went well. fell asleep in psyc. wore a corset to class drew gourds...threw gourds. decorated my room. its pretty

i am Alice</llj-cut>

devoid of punctuation

2004-10-07T22:18:12Z

♥pen and inl marks on my hands my wrists old habbits die die harder than i ever wanted to fix to fix to fix to fondle and fornicate when theres no one around and the world is spinning and the colors the colors fuck the collor suck is all you see reaching reaching and fornicate and fondle pixie dust can make you sneeze among other things reaching reaching learning and wondering wondering believing the things you hear and forgetting them again afraid of i love you then afaid of i still love you then afraid of i love someone else afraid afraid afraid afraid happy and afraid so slipping and fornicate in your backyard with skinny legs running through your mind with so many things running through your mind so many people not giving up not letting go not hurting not killling not at all destructive habbits die die harder

what i learned in bio today- ish

2004-10-07T02:08:48Z

companies that produce harmful chemicals and products

>Dupont
>conoco
>BF goodrich
>union carbide
>JOHNSON AND JOHNSON
>MONSANTO

these companies produce chemicals and products made from oil. although oil seems to be helpful in daily life...ex: plastics pleather PVC household cleaners patroilium Pharmisudical drugs pesticides yankee candle polyester.....

what most of these products do is not imediately apparent. they have no ability to be broken down. imagine a platic bottle over time sitting on the ground will be burried by dirt in some way or other. plants willl grow over it and take in the nutrients and now pollutants in the soil.

what relivance does this have?

the folliage that you ingest as well as the animals that you eat have these chemicals in them, and since plants are usually eaten in large portions(animals that graze for 10+ hours a day) the accumulation in the predators body(humans) is so imense that this little disease you may or may not have heard of is caused.......cancer? heard of it?

and those wonderful companies that i have cited above make these products just for you! isnt that nice.

oh lets take this a bit farther.

monsanto creates really helpfull drugs and PHarmisudicals such as chemotherapy and cancer treatments.
thats good right?
well it would be if they hadn't created and mass manufatured cancer causing agents such as roundup and other toxic HOUSEHOLD( as in its your lungs man, your skin that hits the stuff)cleaners. hmm, theres DDT which actually shows up earlier in the food chain than just higher predators. they also manufacture....oh whats that name.....its quite deadly....um...makes your skin melt off? oh yeah *agent orange.

essentially they toy with the toxic products and when they screwed up and the shit hit the fan, people got sick, it leeches into the soil, they decided......more money for us! lets charge people thousands of dollars for a drug that SOMETIMES helps cancer. lets just keep our market of toxins, get lax in pollution control and then make money off that.

this is what oil gives us: dependancy upon things that we dont actually need, corporations that take and take and rape environments of their natural balance essentially killing whole populations of organisms and echosystems. they give us...CANCER

this is what they dont give us
>information
>truth
>a chance for new markets
>a glance into who and what is protecting them.......you put 2&2 together....

its not about free market its not about you and i and us..... its about the fact that the media says that el ninio is a naural phenomionon when its caused by global climate change its when the government even conciders mining and deforesting the only national parks we have its about the facts and the truth that this pllanet cant support us like this. the balance is so off that the planet cant support a population boom....expected in the next couple decades.
\

ITS OUR PROBLEM, TODAY.

im on the no C.A.R.B. diet

no- C.heeny, A.shcroft, R.umsfeild, B.ush

work

2004-05-23T16:37:02Z

its no picnic

haha

2004-05-06T00:44:39Z

I LOVE YOGA

yawn

2004-04-26T06:13:27Z

sleep evasion:

UNSUCCESSFUL

status:
mission incomplete

nothing_eternal @ 2004-04-11T21:40:00

2004-04-12T00:53:50Z

Once upon a time...

there was a man who wished for nothing more than to defeat his enemies. So he pledged to his people that he would wage war on the enemy. And the people and would never rest until it was over. The leader was organized and when he was ready he told the soldiers to go to this foreign land and take some messengers to inform the village of the accomplishments they were about to undertake. So the war was provoked and the leader not accepting this as enough he set to destroying the unpleasant visions in nightmares and the monsters under the bed that the townspeople feared so much. Many soldiers were sent to do this bidding elsewhere in the world. The messengers that returned came with wonderful news there were captives and victories with so few deceased that the town celebrated. They danced and hugged and waited for their husbands and sons and brothers to return. Many years later no men returned. The leader was to blame so they turned to him and asked where were their families? So he told them the truth…
A uprising in their nightmares and monsters had killed all of the men, and the enemy fought back…
…All Were Slain.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha...hee hooo ::sigh

2004-03-17T04:27:08Z

Who were you in a past life? by Kat007
Name:
Birthdate:
Favorite Color:
Country:
You were most probably:	Edgar Allan Poe
If not then you were:	A pair of womens' leotards

Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

hmm...

2004-02-07T15:31:14Z

Dream Gently

ler

2004-01-30T02:14:45Z

in my head- confusion reigns!'

well i had a wonderful day and then my parents came home. i dont think its their fault but yea....gahh and i was doing soo much better!

ive had some fantastiK times with ( im not going to pretend anyone else reads this) you! well once again im exhausted and im headding to follow the directions on the shampoo bottel

dream gently

nothing_eternal @ 2004-01-19T09:45:00

2004-01-20T02:45:37Z

jeremy you make this worth it. welll see the reason why i dont go on here (often) is because it took ten minutes just to get logged in as in "welcome nothing_eternal would you...bla bla bla" yes and this excessive waiting and woops, nope "try again later" eight ball crap just doesnt go well with me.

well turns out my mother was being unreasonable..who'd have thought. and i get the car but i dont really go anyplace anyway, yea so! you and me borders- sometime in the not too distant future yes? because i tried reading five books i have alreay read and i got two words in and lost intrest. i finished fight club and i dont know what to think of it i think i rushed it and didnt let it sink in enough because it stopped connecting to any sort of thought in my brain. but it was a good book?

yes so i am tired and cranky and the constant orders filtering into the room are getting to me sooooo i am headding out, in , well over...more away than anything...yea.

vagueistics- the studdy of things kindof not entirely like that.

right,

2004-01-20T02:44:27Z

oops

2004-01-17T04:15:10Z

lost the car for another month- someone make it easier on me and shoot me first, heres the cycle i screw up i get punished i feel less worthy to leave the house the house tourments me untill i can leave again then i screw up lets all yell at lauren come on everyone together! fuck you rachel fuck you mother fuck you father AND FUCK YOU WORLD. im tired and i wnt to sleep and wake up someplace else i want someone to take me and hold me tell me what to do because i have no fucking clue. everything feels so far away..

suffocation

noo

2004-01-12T19:02:19Z

this computer isnt working and i most likely wont post later. umm call me if youd like but i hate LJ because its so difficult and moody

bahhhhhhhh

2003-12-10T03:22:22Z

did you miss me!?!?!? doubt it. things.. well... bahhh

nothing_eternal @ 2003-11-17T13:51:00

2003-11-17T18:58:11Z

everything is happening and too damn fast!! i need a skateboard or rolerblades then ill grab onto some passing life and ill catch up. hungerrrr i could go for some eggnog squee!! isnt that the nost disgusting word look at it EGGNOG its all naisily and.... ugh. well im going to go meet Jessi and move the trunk..yes trunk...no not of a car the lind you store things in....NO NOT ON A CAR!! ^_^

while browsing the net

2003-11-03T01:09:55Z

i am not currently available right now due to extreme mental illness n acute depression. however, if u would like to be transfered to another correspondent who is not quite as disturbed, please press the number that best fits your personality: -if u are obsessive compulsive, pls press "1" repeadly. -if u are codependant, pls ask someone to press "2". -if u have multiple personalities, pls press "3", "4", n "5". -if u are paranoid delusional, we know who u are n what u want. Just stay on the line so we can trace ur call. -if u are schizophrenic, listen carefully n the little voices in ur head will tell u which number to press. -if u are manic depressive, it doesn't matter what number u press, no one will answer.
Daisy blum

-"What are you smoking?"
-"I haven't decided yet."
Daisy blum

I have a story for you: Once upon a time in the glorified regions of southern Spain, where no man should live... there lived a man.
Daisy blum

I excell at stringing together delicate and eloquent words that sound pretty, but mean nothing. I think I excell at indecision, but I'm not sure. And I'm one of the best procrastinators around. And I probably excell at some good things too.
Daisy blum

"Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever." - Napoleon

"Ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put." - Winston Churchill

these quotes got me in so much shit

poem

2003-11-03T00:23:51Z

say hello to the girl in the mirror
say hello to her
you gave her all you had
you told her all you know
and she drowns in it all
she weeps in your presence
wanting to run into the rain
wanting to stumble and
wanting to scream
and
wanting the things you dont have
wanting herself and wanting the world
you gave her all your love
it tore her down to shreds
say hello to the day she goes
to throw it all away
the day she leaves
she throws it all away
wanting to run into the rain
wanting to stumble and
wanting to scream
and
wanting the things you dont have
wanting herself and wanting the world
...in the mirror

slacking

2003-10-28T00:52:43Z

bid anyone else note the beautiful sky? as i was driving aroun listining to 80's love songs i was staring at it....dont worry i pulled over, it was surreal the sky was a deep purple-blue while the clouds were an orange-red. the heat must have triggered some wierd wind the clouds were low but speeding by and he wind wasnt as strong as this but they were just in turmoil. im not holding together very well so with the violent beauty of the sky the music and being so lonely i cant breathe i started crying...jesus i wish people in school would allow my presence to be known........oh well, sorry to depress you very few who read my journal. but i dont have anywhere to go so you are stuck.

yo

2003-10-24T00:57:49Z

hey.. today was a day. no not a good day but im still alive so it wasnt horrific. yeaaaaaa im trying to read everyone's journals so if i dont get to it im sory

...

2003-10-21T01:37:28Z

"no one gives a shit, as long as we smile" song i heard on the radio ^_^

not what not me
caress your empty wound
eyes so sunken
you see your shadow
you breathe your chest
heart breaking falling behind
your steps so weak
they dont eco today
echo tomorow
echo tomorow
smiling dull
sharpened to wit
cynical laughter
hole in your head
to see a hollow
hands lost in your dreams
you drop to the floor
to echo tomorow
echo tomorow
echo tomorow

**************
lonely bored and empty
wonder where you are
and slip away to darkness
thinking of your distance
to me

*^*^*^

i am defined as intertwined
thoughts combined
i find
a heavy mind
of pain unkind
blade refined
i am defined.

~*~*

always thought someone'd be there someone's gone not enough to hold on come on save me

!@#$%^&*

afraid of you
your voice
where you are
afraid to go on
moving on like this
its moving
solid
still
backwards to pretend
you're moving on
distressing thoughts
placed on top.....

night

im in school...

2003-10-20T14:18:16Z

maha!! i finally found the way to get on here in school so instead of slacing off and reading online comics like "sinfest" and "daily Peeg" i can write on my livejournal. i love having multi-slacking options. ahh in school again after another hellish weekend...in sone ways i am relieved and in others i reaaaallllly want to be shot in the face!!! ^_^ gah. hey guess what i got sick again. so as i suffer through this intensly boring class period where the work i am supposed to be doing mounts upon itself more and more i feel the urge to slide off my chair in a puddle of melted flesh, you know where the only thing left is your eyes and whom ever finds you is severely disgusted and runs off screaming in the way that only severely scarred people do. k! onto less appealing things... or not.jesus i cant get over how much i just dont want to deal with anything. i know i should and that it would be easier in the end but rightnow i cant see any way to bring myself to actually communicate with people on a deeper level than ::prrowr:: le sigh...last night i started actually doing something CREATIVE and in my room no less. i almost collapsed with glee even though it was started with extreem frusteration. but this is not the point.as i was working 10:30 hit and i got a severe toung thrashing by my parents. i really want out. ten thirty. am i some sort ofchild with a bed time? doesnt it ever hit them that im not just the same infant i once was, its been a few years since the nightlight and them telling me goodnight sweet dreams and toucking me in, goddamnit.i never get a chance to really make something worthwhile in that house. im learning to hate it here. just wondering but did any of you older folk out there hate.. i mean severely hate as in never to go back or set foot inside my house again, it scares me because before ray left he was telling me he hoped that i never felt that i didnt have a home someplace...heh look at me now. some say home is where the heart is but if its lying broken in my hand what happens now. what happens...? god im so pathetic lately, steph came over last night and i scared her away she was like umm i really have to go finish my...laundry though she originally caled to go do something for the night i wasnt allowed. so she left. what else is new. i guess everyone is sick of my constant complaining. im just looking for someone to fucking take all this away. looking for an answer. where are you? i need someone to heal this.